the desire

I'm gonna sing this song
To let you know that you're not alone
And if you're like me
You need hope, coffee, and melody
So sit back down
Let the world keep spinning ‘round
For yesterday's gone and today is waiting on you to show your face

It might not be
The prettiest thing that you'll ever see
But it’s a new day, oh baby, it’s a new day
And it might not look like
A beautiful sunrise
But it's a new day, oh baby, it’s a new day

I’m a pilgrim soul
I've traveled far and come back home
This land is hard and cold
For those who long to love
And I know it might seem
That the world is crumbling
But it’s me and you dancing in the kitchen at 2 am
And we're still alive

It’s the calm of the storm that comes blowing in
It’s the springtime saying I'm back again
The clouds that roll by
Crossing moonlight
Me and you love – everything's alright
Standing in the rain with nowhere to go
Laughing and we're spinning and I hope that you
Remember this day
For the rest of your life
Me and you love – everything’s gonna be alright

And it just might be
The prettiest thing that you'll ever see
It’s a new day
Oh baby, it’s a new day
If you look outside
To see a beautiful sunrise
It’s a new day
~ robbie seay band

i don't know if i'm just getting busier than i've ever been, or if i'm tired of blogging. i just don't do it anymore.

consider this an official notice of my "break" from blogging for now. i don't have the time or inclination to update it, though i have many thoughts to share. a dear friend of my mother's (who also happens to be the mother of my friend) told me that i should be journalling my life story right now because of all the great things that have happened and are happening. don't worry, i will keep records somewhere. just not here, right now.

fall was too short. but now it's pretty much done, so bring on the winter!!

oh, and one more thought. God provides. wow. we need to and CAN trust him with specifics in our lives.

i love roller coasters. love them. much love is in my heart for them. i dream about them. i think about them. i ride them and i get nervous about them. i love them.

from the time i was small till i was 21 (a mere year ago), i have been scared of rides. i can mentally convince myself to go on them, but if they are high and scary-looking, i spend too much time being scared to enjoy them. upside down rides were a definite no-no.

however, one of my favorite people loves rides and so this person, let's call him "tim," pressured me into going on rides at the red river ex. it took a lot of convincing but by the end i was enjoying myself and laughing. and then we all went on a road trip! so began the transformation of marcia's opinion on rides and roller coasters.

remember highschool when the boys used to say "ill-dog-rider?"
they were weird.

but i've decided i like the word "ill" better than "sick." i've been sick for over a week now and it is awful. i am ill. i've only actually had a fever 4 of those days, but the rest of the time i've been hurting, headachey, no appetite and just not feeling like myself. i think i may have hit the point of bodily exhaustion. this is so weird, cuz i'm never sick this much! it's very very odd that i'm sick for more than one day!

on a brighter note, tonight is the fulfillment of one of my hopes from the past oh...6 years.

"matt damon!"

i used to try to figure out if i was surrendering ALL to God. i would pick apart every part of my life and determine that i had failed, because not ALL was surrendered to his will over mine.

i'm learning that the first step is not to abandon all. the first step is to surrender. one decision, one stronghold, one unselfish act at a time.

i surrender.

a few days after my post about God partnering with us, i heard a teaching about God's purpose for Israel. it blew my mind. the whole idea that God intricately designed a legitimate way for us to be his friend, partner and bride reminded me again of the incredible supremacy of God. his thoughts are higher than ours!

God created the jewish people so that through man he could redeem our relationship to him. Those of us who are non-Jewish are grafted in. We are given the opportunity to join this family of set apart, priestly God-chasers. God wants to partner with us!! He made man to be with him, perfect, and man screwed up. Only man could fix that mistake. But not any imperfect man. So God created a family through which to raise up the Messiah. He created a family that was set apart to set the world right once again. Through this family came Jesus, the god-man. God came close to his people so we could come close to him!

Why is there so much trouble in the middle east? Because satan knows that Jesus will not return until his family, his people, cry out for him to come back. Jesus went through the cross, the humiliation of being human, the permanency of being human, becuause he wanted closeness with US. I don't know where we all get this idea that Jesus is just waiting to spring his return on us, when we least expect it, so he can catch us doing something wrong. Jesus is coming back as a judge, no doubt about it, BUT, he wants his people (the Israelites, and the grafted-in Gentiles) to WANT him back. Otherwise, what was the point of all he suffered? he did these things becuase he wants us to draw near to him.

Satan knows that Jesus will not return until his people are desperate for his presence. Because of this, Satan is trying to obliterate the Israelite people so they cannot cry out for Jesus’ return. (I'm not taking a side in the conflicts, or saying that Israel has been blameless in all the tension. I AM saying that it makes sense that satan would pit people against people and create destruction for both sides because it will divide and disillusion their view of God.)

Back to crying out for Jesus to return...as grafted-in Gentiles, we too will be cut off from God’s family if we do not support Israel in crying out for Christ's return. The Jewish people are not the old story, marginalized because our new evangelical Christianity is so much better. The Jewish people ARE the story, present and alive. We, as non-Jewish followers of Christ, are called to support the family he chose to use to bring salvation to the world. We are called to intercede and draw others near to him.

it blows my mind. his thoughts are higher than mine!

i was all ready to write a post about the return of my blue flowered bike helmet. i had plans to take pictures of my lovely blue bike helmet and tell you all about how it is worn proudly as i bike to work every morning.

however, before i had the chance to photograph my special helmet, something terrible happened. on june 13, 2007 in the afternoon, my blue helmet, along with her beloved matching lock and the bicycle it lovingly protected, was stolen. taken away from me. no, they did not die. but they were taken. and my heart was saddened.

on a bright note, as i was shopping in the wal-mart of my hometown this weekend, i found blue's many and wonderful brothers and sisters. so, i passed on my goodbyes via these abundant (and still on sale) brothers and sisters.